Breakups suck, but most of us can agree that our exes suck more. Here’s how to get over them in 3 simple steps to get you up and ready to pursue your own life again. Even if you’re the dumpee or the dumper, everyone gets sad after breakups – it’s science!
Make A List Of Pros And Cons
A great way to start is by making an itemized list of all the good things and all the bad things about your ex. This works for several reasons, the first is because it forces you to look at your relationship in a factual, logical way (removes emotion from the picture). Then take time to consider how many of the good things can be done by someone else. If it’s too hard to answer those questions it often helps to ask your friends or family. Having a list of all the things you liked about the relationship will help you in your search for a future partner, but best not to look at this list again until you are ready to look for a new partner. After this, a good thing to do is place the list of all the bad things about your ex somewhere easily visible. This way, should you ever start having the blues, that list is right there to remind you how much better you are without them.
Delete And Get Rid Of Anything You Have Of Your Ex
Out of sight out of mind, this idea works wonders when getting over an ex. You’ve probably heard that you should fill your time with things that you don’t associate with your ex. This works because humans naturally look back on things in a positive way, and if we start remembering our ex, which happens when we do things that remind us of them, one often starts to remember the good things more than the bad. That’s why getting rid of everything you have of your ex will help prevent you from thinking about them (in an often more positive way than reality), and why the list from before proves to be very useful!
Get Physically Active
Our last tip will delve into the science behind breakups a little more. Even if they don’t get as far as love, most relationships will release plenty of love chemicals like endorphins, dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin, to name a few. In particular, oxytocin is known as the cuddle chemical which gets released when one has physical contact, even if that contact is as simple as hugs or holding hands. It’s also one of the chemicals that we sorely lack when we get out of a relationship because our source of oxytocin used to be them. This is why a ‘rebound’ is often suggested, but that isn’t usually the best decision. Instead, you can get the most of these chemicals from working out. Physical exercise is a great way to restore the chemical imbalance in your brain, and it’s an incredibly productive pass time that keeps you healthy and distracted until your heart heals.
With these tricks you should feel better much fast and ready to date again, but when you do remember to check out these 5 red flags to watch out for!
And if you want to watch movies to help you get over your ex, check out these 36 Breakup Movies.